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Romance is the urge to live and the willingness to die for another. Marriage is the urge to possess another.

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affection

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Romeo and Juliet

Romeo and Juliet Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet is a romance of love at first sight between two youngsters separated by powerful social barriers. The joyous intensity of their emotional attraction for one another brings them together in spite of the animosity between their families, but patient and impulsive, their love lacks the strength and maturity to prevail over the negative atmosphere.

 

Articles on Romeo and Juliet
Romeo and Juliet’s deep love and care for each other is an excellent example of Affection, Level 5 in the Scale of Romance. See the article and videos.
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Plot Summary

 A long-standing feud between the Montagues and the Capulets flares up in a brawl on the streets of Verona, halted only by the arrival of Prince Escalus. Romeo, only son of the Montagues, is hopelessly in love with the unattainable Rosaline. In hope that meeting other girls will shake him out of his melancholy, his friends Mercutio and Benvolio persuade him to go to a party at Capulet's house. Romeo agrees, hoping to see Rosaline there. Instead he meets and falls instantly in love with Juliet, Capulet's only daughter. She returns his love. With the help of Juliet's Nurse, they are secretly married the next day by Friar Lawrence.

Juliet's cousin Tybalt quarrels with Romeo and in the fight which ensues, Mercutio is killed. Romeo avenges his friend's death and kills Tybalt, for which he is banished from Verona on pain of death. After spending a single night with his bride, he escapes to Mantua. Juliet learns that her parents plan to marry her to Count Paris in two days' time. Capulet then decides the wedding will take place the following day. Distraught, Juliet turns to Friar Lawrence who devises a plan. He gives her a drug which will make her appear to have died. The Friar hopes that her parents will place her in the family tomb and when she awakes from her drugged sleep, she will find Romeo waiting for her. The Friar writes to Romeo to tell him of the plan, but Romeo never receives the letter. Romeo hears of Juliet's death and returns to Verona, to see her in the Capulet tomb. There he finds Paris, whom he murders. Romeo enters the tomb, finds Juliet's 'corpse' and poisons himself. Juliet wakes to find Romeo dead. Unable to live without him, she stabs herself. The Capulets and Montagues, united in grief, vow to end their feud.

 

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Gone with the Wind
Directed by Franco Zeffirelli
Written by William Shakespeare (play), Franco Brusati, Masolino D'Amico,
Franco Zeffirelli (screenplay)
Starring Leonard Whiting as Romeo, Olivia Hussey as Juliet
Copyright belongs to Paramount pictures

 

 

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Sense and Sensibility

Sense and Sensibility vividly depicts the power of pure emotions, unmixed by possessiveness, impulsive attachment, egoism or assertiveness. Based on a novel by Jane Austen, the story revolves the romantic relationships of two sisters of very different character, the elder quiet, reserved and deeply emotional; the younger impulsive and expressive. Their characters and experiences are a study in contrast between vital infatuation and true affection.

 

Articles on Sense and Sensibility

 The relationship between Marianne and Willoughby is an example of Level 2 Physical Attraction on Scales of Romance. See the article and videos.

 Edward and Elinor's love is a fine example of True Affection, Level 5 on the Scales of Romance. See the article and videos.

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Plot Summary

Mr. Dashwood died, leaving his mother and three daughters, Elinor, Marianne and Margaret, with very little means to support themselves. Quiet, homely Elinor develops an affection for Mr. Edward Ferrars, her sister-in-law's wealthy brother, and her feelings appear to be reciprocated, until she discovers that he has been secretly engaged for many years to Lucy Steele, whom he met in his youthful days but does not love anymore. When she learns of the engagement from Lucy herself, she is heartbroken. Though Elinor and Edward harbor strong feelings of love for one another, he feels bound by his commitment to Ms. Steele. Elinor feels resigned to accept that commitment and accepts the prospect of remaining unmarried. Then suddenly Edward receives a letter from Lucy informing him that she has fallen in love with his brother, Robert, and they have married. Edward goes to Elinor to express his true feelings and they are reunited happily in the end.

In contrast to her elder sister, Marianne is beautiful, outgoing, excitable, passionate and romantic. When she is caught in a storm with an injured leg, she is rescued by the dashing young Mr. Willoughby who happened to be passing by and carries her safely home. Marianne is charmed and swept off her feet by his physical appearance and gallant manners. Willoughby courts her and leads her to believe he is deeply in love. She is heartbroken when she later learns about his bad reputation with women and his engagement to a wealthy woman for her money. Marianne discovers that a lover's character, capacity for real affection and personal values are a far truer and more lasting basis for successful relationship than external appearances. She matures and marries Brandon, a 37 year old Colonel who loves her deeply.

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Directed by Ang Lee
Book written by Jane Austen
Screenplay by Emma Thompson
Starring Emma Thompson as Elinor Dashwood,Kate Winslet as Marianne Dashwood
Hugh Grant as Edward Ferrars,Greg Wise as John Willoughby
Copyright belongs to Columbia Pictures Corporation

 

 

External Links

  • Wikipedia provides the plot summary, background, publication history and extensive links to sites on Sense and Sensibility, the cast and producers.
  • The Internet Movie Database, IMDB has information related to the movie and its actors.
  • HomeVideos offers interesting movie reviews of Sense and Sensibility.
  • Free eBook can be downloaded.
  • Essays on Literary criticism of Sense and Sensibility.
  • Watch Sense and Sensibility Trailer from YouTube.
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Jerry Maguire

Jerry Maguire This movie depicts the unlikely romance between a high flying, high energy sports agent Jerry and a shy, homely accountant Dorothy. Through their relationship Jerry moves from the charms of sexual and vital attraction to discover the greater richness and sweetness of loyalty and affection. Dorothy’s intense goodwill and affection become the foundation for Jerry’s high achievement.

 

Articles on Jerry Maguire

 Jerry and Dorothy’s relationship is a fine example of Affection - Level 5 in the Scale of Romance. See the article and videos.

Avery's response to adversity is a good example of how relationship based on Physical attraction cannot survive adverse situations See the article and videos.

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Plot Summary

Jerry Maguire (Tom Cruise) is an agent with a major sports management firm. He's enthusiastic, successful, a great negotiator and people like him. But it begins to dawn on Jerry that there's something wrong with what he's doing, and not long after a troubling encounter with the son of an injured athlete he represents, Jerry has a serious crisis of conscience. In the midst of a sleepless night, Jerry writes a memo calling on himself and his colleagues to think more about the long-term welfare of the clients they represent and less about immediate profits. While everyone around him applauds the sentiment, Jerry's superiors think his ideas are bad for business; Jerry is fired, and, rather than standing in solidarity with him, his "friends" in the firm scramble like sharks to claim Jerry's clients.

At the end of his last day, the only people willing to join Jerry as he strikes out on his own are staff accountant Dorothy (Renee Zellweger), a single mother secretly in love with him, and Rod Tidwell (Cuba Gooding Jr.), a football player whose pride and arrogance have gotten in the way of his reaching his potential. Jerry and Dorothy bond both professionally and romantically, which is a good thing since Jerry's fiancé, Avery has left him after his fall from the ranks of the rich and famous. Jerry is also drawn to Dorothy's son, Ray, and soon he and Dorothy become involved. But Jerry's future rides on renegotiating Tidwell's contract and during this time he learns that it's best to work from the heart as well as from the head in both his professional and personal life.

 

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Directed by Cameron Crowe
Screenplay by Cameron Crowe
Starring Tom Cruise as Jerry Maguire,Cuba Gooding Jr.as Rod Tidwell,Renée Zellweger as Dorothy Boyd
Copyright belongs to Gracie Films and Tristar Pictures

 

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Level 5 - Affection

Affection is emotional enjoyment of the other person. Affection emanates from the heart. Energy expressing in our emotional center generates intense feelings of affection. At the physical level there is an urge to hold, grasp, and possess the other person in order to derive security, comfort or pleasure from the interaction. At the emotional level there is an urge to give oneself to the other person in order to please and make the other person happy. When affection is very physical, it can be possessive and demanding. True emotional affection for another person is incapable of shouting, anger or meanness of any kind. It is only the vital ego that wants to dominate which can try to hurt the other person. The higher and purer the affection, the less the intensity of the sexual urge. At the same time physical intimacy becomes far sweeter and uplifting because the intensity comes from the pure enjoyment of one’s affection for the other person.

Frank & Mary

In Dr. Thorne, Anthony Trollope portrays the love story of Frank Gresham and Mary Thorne. Frank is the descendant of a long line of Greshams, the richest landowners in their county who had served as its representative in Parliament for many generations. His mother came from a titled and far wealthier aristocratic family. Her social and material demands were so great that Frank’s father was forced to borrow heavily on the family property and eventually to sell a large part of the estate to a self-made Sir Roger Scatherd, a millionaire businessman. Gresham’s debts to Sir Roger continued to mount, jeopardizing what remained of Frank’s inheritance. Mary Thorne was the illegitimate, adopted niece of Dr. Thorne, the Greshams’ family physician. Both Frank and Mary believed she was actually the doctor’s daughter, though Frank’s parents knew and kept the secret during years when the children grew up together as playmates. When Frank came of age he announced his intention of marrying beautiful Mary. His mother vigorously protested and sent Frank away, arguing that Frank must marry a wealthy woman in order to restore the family’s financial fortunes. In spite of her ardent love for Frank, Mary did all she could to discourage Frank from displeasing his parents. But Frank remained true and adamant in his love for her, even when he was informed that she was illegitimate as well as penniless. Frustrating all his mother’s attempts to prevent it, Frank finally declared his intention of marrying Mary. Then it was revealed by Dr. Thorne that Mary was actually the niece and heir to the deceased Roger Scatherd’s enormous fortune, which meant that she already held legal title to more than half of the Gresham property. Frank’s unwillingness to renounce his love for Mary in spite of intense social pressure and the prospect of ruin, and Mary’s unwillingness to accept his love for fear of the harm and disgrace it might bring on him and his family, reflect the depth of affection with which they loved one another. The sincerity of their feelings enabled each of them to willingly sacrifice for the good of the other. More significantly, it had the strength to fully restore Frank’s family heritage and Mary’s social legitimacy. Love has that power over life.

Inman & Ada (Cold Mountain)

When it gives rise to physical or vital attraction, love at first sight may last only as long as the partners are in physical or social contact. But when it touches the deeper emotions of the heart, even a few moments together can give birth to an affection that outlives years of separation and silence. It forms an emotional bridge of connectivity that can enable the lovers to overcome incredible obstacles to reunite. In Cold Mountain, a beautiful city-bred preacher’s daughter named Ada Monroe meets a shy, handsome woodworker named Inman in a secluded rural part of North Carolina at the outbreak of the Civil War. Though they exchange only a few formal words, their hearts respond to one another. When Inman enlists to fight for the South, they exchange photographs and a single parting kiss. After the death of her father, Ada finds herself helpless, defenseless and pursued by a local bully named Teague. Daily she voices a heart-felt prayer for Inman to return. The sins he has committed in battle make Inman feel unworthy of her love. Only partly recovered from a serious wound received in battle, he risks death for desertion and travels the long dangerous road back to Cold Mountain. At one point he is given shelter by a beautiful young woman with child, who offers herself to him. In spite of feeling a strong physical attraction for her, his longing for Ada prevents him from responding to her invitation. Inman eventually meets Ada and after she conceives with a child, he then kills Teague before being mortally wounded himself. His love was powerful enough to find her and protect her and leave her with a son to raise. The strength of their affection could achieve this much despite the extreme social turmoil and destruction of war.

Immortal Infatuation (Romeo and Juliet)

We find a similar instance of intense emotional love in Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet. Here too, the young lovers were separated by powerful social barriers because they came from traditionally warring families. Here too, the lovers cared only for one another and threw aside the objections of family and society. Why then did their love end in the tragedy rather than blissful fulfillment? In this case, the lovers were extremely young, very impulsive and desperately impatient. Unlike Frank and Mary, they lacked the patience and maturity to wait for circumstances to improve. Patience requires strength. Their love had intensity but no strength to wait and persevere. Impulsiveness and impatience can never serve as the basis for accomplishment in life or romance. True romance is forgetful of self. It requires sacrifice not wild, reckless or desperate demands. It is willing to give with no thought of return and regards only the happiness and fulfillment of the beloved.

Lancelot & Guinevere (First Knight)

Lady Guinevere’s escort is attacked by a powerful warlord while she is en route to Camelot to marry the noble King Arthur. Lancelot, a wandering vagabond swordsman, rescues her from the attackers. He is instantly attracted by Guinevere’s majestic beauty and noble character. She feels the powerful lure of his physical manliness and courage, but resists his sexual advances. Lancelot arrives in Camelot just in time for her wedding with Arthur. Shortly afterwards she is kidnapped by the same warlord, who wants to gain her kingdom by blackmail. Again Lancelot single-handedly saves her. His confidence, courage and willingness for self-sacrifice move her deeply and she has to struggle not to give in to the powerful emotions that draws them to one another.

Knighted for his heroic service to the crown, Lancelot remains in Camelot, secretly nurturing an all-consuming passion for the queen. Eventually he comes to accept the ideals that Arthur stands for and decides out of respect for the King and Queen to leave Camelot forever. His acceptance of noble ideals elevates him even further in her emotions. Heartbroken to be losing him forever without ever having felt the joy of his love, she offers one kiss. Arthur discovers them embracing and is furious at their treasonous betrayal. In defense she explains that her love for both men is real and true, but different. She loves and worships Arthur with her all her heart’s purity and mind’s admiration. At the same time she feels powerfully drawn toward by a physical and vital passion elevated and ennobled by a deep emotional bond of affection and self-giving. The contrast between the two relationships brings out both the most positive aspects and two very different forms of romance.

Jerry & Dorothy (Jerry Maguire)

This movie depicts the unlikely romance between a high flying, high energy sports agent and a shy, homely accountant. After Jerry writes a memo proposing that his agency he works for adopt higher ethical standards in serving their clientele, Jerry is summarily dismissed from his lucrative job. Inspired by the courage and values espoused in his memo, Dorothy is the only employee at the firm willing to stand up for principles and follow Jerry’s lead. So she quits her job and together they establish a separate company, but manage to retain only one of Jerry’s former clients. With no income and no prospects, they struggle to make ends meet. When Jerry’s glamorous girlfriend also deserts him, he is left failed and friendless. Through it all, Dorothy remains loyal and offers unstinting support. Jerry develops a fondness for Dorothy’s son from a previous marriage, has a one-night affair with Dorothy, and then overhears her telling her sister how much she loves him. Finally Dorothy senses that Jerry is only maintaining their relationship out of sense of appreciation for the support she has offered him, so she announces that she is leaving to take a job in another city. Jerry impulsively proposes to her on the spur of the moment and they marry. Again after marriage, she feels that she and her son have trapped Jerry into a relationship that does not suit him and she decides to withdraw. After months of total failure in his work, Jerry finally has a major breakthrough when his sole client achieves superstar status and signs a huge multi-year contract. Finally vindicated in the decisions he has taken, Jerry discovers that without Dorothy his success brings him no sense of fulfillment, so he rushes back to reunite with her.

Through their relationship Jerry moves from the charms of sexual and vital attraction to discover the greater richness and sweetness of lasting affection. As in the case of Mae Braddock in Cinderella Man, Dorothy’s intense goodwill and affection are a powerful support for her lover’s high achievement.

Edward & Elinor (Sense & Sensibility)

Elinor, Marianne and Margaret are daughters of Mr. Dashwood who died leaving his wife and daughters with very little means to support themselves. Elinor develops an affection for Mr. Edward Ferrars, her sister-in-law's wealthy brother, and her feelings appear to be reciprocated. Edward has been engaged for many years to Lucy Steele, whom he met in his youthful days but does not love anymore. He wants to tell Elinor about it, but he does not find a suitable opportunity. Later Elinor hears about it from Lucy herself and is heartbroken. Though Elinor and Edward harbor strong feelings of love for one another, he feels bound by his commitment to Ms. Steele. Elinor feels resigned to accept that commitment and remain an aging spinster. Then suddenly Edward receives a letter from Lucy informing him that she has fallen in love with his brother, Robert, and they have married. Edward goes to Elinor to express his true feelings and they are reunited happily in the end.

The story vividly represents the power of pure emotions, unmixed by possessiveness, impulsive attachment, egoism or assertiveness. Elinor controls and refrains from expressing her deep affection for Edward until the power of her love removes all obstacles and brings her love to her. Her love is sharply contrast to the flighty impulsive physicality of her sister Marianne, described in Level 2.

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